angry inch

ok, confession time: i hate typing this, but it is true. i had started smoking cigs again. :( it started back in OH. i had 3 at a friend's house wednesday night before i left. none on thursday, but i kept walking back and forth by the smoking lounge in the atlanta airport during my long, frustrating delay. contemplating going in and bumming a smoke with each and every pass. the smell kept me from going in though, each and every time. it smelled so horrible, just passing by. but then came friday, my first full day back in AZ. i had a horrible morning. i bought a pack shortly after leaving for my first job. since, i went one day without smoking, but 'caved' shortly after getting off work. now here i sit. having just crushed and threw away 12 smokes. i also threw away my ash tray 'cup'. this 'cup' originated in my jet black 2000 pontiac grand am gt, but made the move into my jeep. i do miss that car :( it even got good gas mileage. anywho, the 'cup' had reemerged, it will not have the oppurtunity to do so again. now here i sit. i have failed. the only thing that would make it worse, is to keep failing. days of the new's enemy is playing right now. a refrain is 'it is something you need to change' followed by a background dude doing a weird 'yeah'-like call. how true, days of the new and background dude, how true. so, tonight starts back to the way i was, from june 8th thru june 20th.

so, what else? this week has FLOWN by. in 3 hours, it will be one week into july. dude!

in 8 days, i will most likely be offline for a week. i will be in sunset beach, on a family reunion vacation. new hampshire, vermont, new york, massachusetts, ohio, and arizona will all be represented in south carolina. ages will vary from less than a year old all the way up to my grandma's age.

ok, time to finish up some 'projects'. i have sorta been sick all week, and probably should get some decent sleep. but then again, tomorrow is friday. saturday i can sleep in :)

'yeah'